Dating Under the Influence: not recommended. Just remembered that while drinking vodka cranberries and watching so-bad-it's-good reality show, ALSO invited Skinny Soccer Player to be my date on Saturday. Why oh why? Must break date. Or lose 20 pounds in 4 days: is that possible?
Maybe he won't wear a ratty t-shirt and old jeans and get crumbs all over his face when he eats. Maybe I won't break apart every nice guy who shows interest in me. Maybe I won't become bitch on his ass and stop returning his phone calls. Maybe he will bulk up? Before Saturday? Maybe I will stop feeling like a fat Amazon...all the fucking time?
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